The Learning Process

At times you may find that there is something in your life that has to change but it seems like it is taking forever to actually change it. “I still do the same thing”, you exclaim! “When am I ever going to change?”

Good news… you are already changing. It is just that you are in the middle of it and not at the end.

What is the problem…
For many of us, we look to the end result to determine if we have changed. This tells us if the fruits of our efforts are worthwhile or not. Sometimes we give up because the same problem we wanted to change is still with us.

The problem here is that we hope that change will be instantaneous. We do not want to go through the long process that brings about lasting change. It may be because we do not recognise the steps in the process by which we can mark our way through it and so we become disheartened and give up. It could also be because it is hard work to change. This becomes too much for us to keep going, so we go back to our old ways. Not because they are better, but because they are easier.

We want to ensure that our attempts at change are successful. To do this we need to know the steps of change. Using these we can then guage our position in the process of change. So what are these steps?

The steps of change
Whenever you break a habit, or change something that you have been doing for a while, there is a process that you will go through. The good news is that the first step in this process is recognising there is a problem. If you have done that then you are already on your way to changing. What follows is each step and a short description of what it involves:

Step 1 – Recognising there is a problem
It can take a long time before you become aware of a problem that many of the people close to you have known about for ages. Sometimes the problem is something that everyone else knows about but you do not. People will sometimes try to help you reach this step by telling you about the problem. Until you are ready to receive this sort of information you will just brush it off as someone intruding on your life. Once aware of the problem however, you can start to do something about it.

Step 2 – Recognising the need for change
It is one thing to recognise a problem and quite another to realise there is a need to change it. This is the launching point for all change processes. The move from recognising the problem to realising there is a need to change it is made within a short time for most people.

Step 3 – Determining what will replace it
Since the problem is something that you may have had for a while it is now ingrained in you as a habit. Habits are hard to break but not impossible. The most important part of changing a habit is determining what will replace it. Habits are not eliminated, they are changed. You cannot eliminate habitually watching television all night. You must replace it with reading, going out or some other activity. The same with all of our habits. Choose something that you want to do, say, or think that will replace your current action, words or thoughts. This prepares you for the next step.

Step 4 – Recognise your problem after the act
Now that you know about your problem and have been thinking about it, you will start to recognise situations when it occurs. The only problem here is that you only recognise it after it has happened. Of course this is the first part of being able to change. Looking at the situation that has just occurred and identifying the best way to replace it in that particular situation helps prevent the same situation occurring again.

Step 5 – Recognising the problem during the act
Having really started to work on the problem you will start to recognise the problem behaviour during the middle of doing it. This is an advance over the previous step and indicates that you are making significant steps toward change.

Step 6 – Recognising the problem just before the act
At this step the problem is almost eliminated although since the behaviour is still there it does not really feel like it. Recognising the problem behaviour just afterwards may not leave room for change just yet but it is solid evidence of how far you have come in changing the behaviour.

Step 7 – Recognising the problem before it happens
This is the moment of seeing change. After living with an awareness of the problem for so long it finally comes to this. By recognising the problem before it happens you can now stop yourself from engaging in the unwanted behaviour. Since you have stopped yourself beforehand all you need to do now is replace it with the desired behaviour.

Step 8 – Building better habits
Now that the problem behaviour has been replaced a few times it will become easier and easier to continue replacing it. Over time it becomes second nature to respond with your preferred behaviour. In doing this the new behaviour becomes cemented into your life as a permanent habit.

Step 9 – Change completed
With your old habit replaced by the new one your change is now complete. Any situation where the old habit would have occured you now see the new habit occurring. The change becomes obvious and you feel better for knowing it has happened. There were some tough times throughout this period of change but now you are through it. The change has been completed.

As you can see, there are quite a number of steps involved in changing something. The time that it takes to move through these steps varies from person to person and from habit to habit. The one thing that we can be sure of though is that we all move through these steps no matter how fast or how slow.

By being aware of these steps, the process of change becomes more rewarding. When you recognise you are doing something in the middle of doing it, you realise that you have already progressed to step 5 even though the undesired behaviour is still there. You are changing, and you now know it too.

That is the steps of change.


NB: I do not hold claim to the originality of this information as it is something that I have gleaned from reading a number of works. It is highly likely that someone else has explained it like this before. I have put this here because so many people seem to get upset with themselves even though they are well advanced in their change process and I wanted them to know that although they have not “arrived”, they are well on the way.


A New Church

I am at a loss. Everything in me wants to fellowship with other people, but nothing in me wants to go to a church. I am not against churches however, it is just that I cannot continue to perform this ritual. It is empty and lifeless to me. The people in the church give the place life and help me through each service, and it is wonderful chatting with them afterwards, but why do I have to endure the service so that I can enjoy this?

Continue reading “A New Church”

It Only Happens When It Rains

Everyone has experience rain. There is nothing new about this experience. Each person living in their own cities has seen the umbrellas come out and people trying to avoid the water that falls from the sky. Yet no matter how many times you see it, when you are in a different place it seems different. The habits of the people in new places are different. And so it was when I first experienced rain in the city of Buenos Aires. Very familiar, and yet different.

Waking Up
It was just another morning as I struggled to open my eyes after yet another late night. There was a strangely familiar noise outside which sounded like wind, but when I had opened the windows and shutters I realised that it was actually rain. It was pouring down too, not like a gentle falling but as though buckets full of water were being poured out all over the city.

An Empty Street
Hurrying to dress, I raced outside to see how the inhabitants of my new home dealt with this new environment. Perhaps not seeing rain for over two months also added to my eagerness. When I reached the street level, what I saw surprised me. Down a street where I cannot enter without choosing a space between all of the people, there was only a handful of people to be found. All of these were hurrying down the street along the edges, with only a couple of brave souls wandering down the middle, something I had only ever known to be full.

Of course many of the people making their way down the street had an umbrella, but I was surprised at just how many people were without them. Both the umbrella people and those without them were competing for the very narrow and highly inconsistent areas of shelter underneath the shop fronts as they made their way hard up against the sides of this pedestrianised street.

The Hazards
As I wandered along the streets, it became obvious that the shelters under the shop fronts were almost useless. Many leaked as much as it rained, and there were often large gaps without any shelter. Not only that, but since everyone had the same idea, there was also the hazard of being spiked by an umbrella or pushed into a puddle by someone scurrying off to their destination.

Puddles were the real hazard here in the rain though. With so much of the sidewalks in disrepair, the missing tiles and holes in the sidewalks became perfect places for the rain to gather, and instead of merely depressions in the walkway there were now great puddles. Added to all of the other puddles, walking became a real hazard. Not only were puddles found along the sidewalks, but also many sections of the roads and gutters had such great sags that the puddles in them were as large as ponds.

In addition to the puddles were the hidden traps, tiles that had long since come unstuck but were still in their place. Stepping on one of these would release the water lying underneath in a strong squirt that reached up inside clothes and along legs. The resultant liquid, mixed as it was with ground tile dust, created a sloppy mud effect wherever it happened to land. Trying to keeping reasonably dry and clean in this new environment was a full time effort.

New Enterprises
The rain had presented a new opportunity for enterprise too, and instantly there were umbrellas for sale in every second shop along the way. Each shop ensured that their umbrellas were prominently displayed to the passing pedestrians, some of which were drenched in water. Enterprising men holding a handful of umbrellas in their arms were also competing for sales, wandering the streets and approaching every person without one. Some had set themselves a display at their feet, sheltered by whatever protection they could find.

People Appearing
As the rain began to ease, people started flooding back onto the streets again. As they appeared I was able to clearly see the effects of the rain. Many people soaked right through included business men as well as those more casually dressed. The sound of squelching feet created after plunging the foot deep into a puddle blended into the other sounds of the street. And people who were soaked through, not from the rain, but from drivers that took glee in spraying people from the deep puddles of water beside the roads.

Lessons Learned
By the time I returned home, rain still falling intermittently, I had learned that the hazards of this place simply increased with rain. Now, not only could I be run over, pushed over, sprain an ankle, or be robbed (some being more likely than others), I could also be skidded into, slip over, submerge my feet, be splashed, sprayed or squirted, and have my eye poked out with an umbrella.

So after this I decided that I like sunny days better. After all, it only happens when it rains.

Freshly Made

What do you do when you get to a new location? There is so much to relearn about where you have just landed, so much to know about the systems and shops in the area. When I had just arrived at my new hostel in Recoleta I needed to orient myself and find out just what was around me. In the process I discovered a takeaway shop unlike any other I had ever seen. What a delight this place was.

The Discovery
As I was out wandering the streets to discover my new neighbourhood I decided that since it was lunch time I needed to eat. It just so happened that I was walking past a local eatery at that very moment, so I stopped in.

The Place
It was a rather ordinary looking shop and did not have anything fancy such as I was accustomed to from Australia, but I had come to expect this after my short time here. I wandered in and found a place on one of the stools at the main bench. There were no tables or chairs here, only stools and benches. The main bench separated customers from the business area of the shop, the other nestled tightly against the large plate glass windows.

There was nothing wrong with this place, it was after all quite a normal looking joint for a meal around here, but it still managed to capture that feel of being only half completed which so many of these places did. Perhaps it was the many broken things around the place that did this, the broken stool that stood in the corner, the severe wobble in the bench against the window, or the cracked glass in one of the display cabinets.

Even the business side of the shop had that feel of being not quite right. Somewhat like the feeling should mum be trying to cook around the broken bits of motorbike that dad had strewn across the benches. It was not that the place was dirty, nor did it have any motorbike parts strewn across its benches, it was actually quite clean in the areas that mattered. Nor was it that the place was really messy, although all the tools of the trade were out and waiting for use on the cooking benches. It was hard to place a finger on the reason for this feeling, but whatever it was I could still feel it.

My Order
After sizing the place up the next step was working out what I wanted. There was a board of Spanish writing of which I could understand none of it. So I kept looking. I was in luck as there were some old and tattered computer printed paper signs plastered over the glass of the display cabinet, which by the looks of its contents was being used as a filing cabinet these days. These signs I had clasped my eyes on sported wonderful pictures of what it was they were selling. I could now ask for something and know what it was going to be. There were not many of them, four in fact, although they repeated so my choice was limited to two.

The price had long since faded from these signs so I took a guess as to how much it would be. I was amazed at how tough it was to decide between my two choices. Fried breaded steak and hot chips or a hamburger. It should not have been a tough choice. Eventually I ordered the hamburger, but by the time it was on the grill I really started wanting the the steak. Perhaps I had ordered the opposite to what I felt like. Perhaps I considered that the hamburger would be cheaper. It was not much cheaper if it was. In any case I was now about to have a hamburger.

Preparing The Food
Most shops these days seem to have everything prepared before they need it. Probably the only process of creating something fresh while they are cooking is when they crack an egg over the hotplate. The shop I was in did it differently. It did not work this way.

The meat patty for my burger was formed from fresh mince, a batch of which looked to have been just completed. An old hand-wound mince grinder on the bench, similar to the style I remember playing with in my grandmothers house, gave testimony to where it would have been ground.

Lettuce leaves were stripped off the plant, rather than taken from a box pre-shredded. Tomatoes were cut to provide the slices for the burger, and so on it was with all of the ingredients that are used to create a complete hamburger. I was surprised that she did not bake the bread too, but this seemed to be the only thing that was not fresh to the moment.

This process of freshness extended even to the hot chips. Potatoes, peeled on the spot, were then forced through a hand operated chip cutter. This machine, resembling a press from a mechanics workshop, produced lush, thick potato chips, ready to fry.

Enjoying The Place
It was quite amazing to watch the preparations taking place before me. Perhaps I simply have not seen things things taking place before. Perhaps there are many places like this but they simply do it out in the back room rather than directly in front of me. I liked it being in front of me. I could see the quality of food that was being prepared. It also gave me something interesting to watch while I waited for my food.

After completing my meal, I was pleasantly surprised to discover that it was much cheaper than I had first expected. As a result, I returned here a few times to sample the large variety of foods available here. Well perhaps it would be more accurate to say that I returned a few times and simply swapped between the two choices that I had from my faded pieces of paper. They were good choices though, and I liked both the hamburger and the crumbed steak.

The Owner She Was
It was after one of these later visits that I realised that the place was run only by one lady. At times she was assisted by her teenage son, although he seemed mainly to be there in the afternoons. She did not seem to be the domesticated sort of woman that one would imagine would do so much cooking. There was a definite edge of firmness about this lady. Some may have said it was a harshness, but they would not have seen her smile that showed off her softer side.

A Genuine Place
When I left that place after my meal, I felt like I was leaving something genuine, a place that had not followed after the look and feel of the MacDonalds in this world. It was fresh and it was also traditional at the same time. Sure it was old, and things were a little tatty, but that just added to its character. It was a place that I felt at home in, and for me, in a new location yet again, this was important.

A little oasis of food – freshly made.

Football Frenzy

In Argentina there are several very popular teams. Probably the two most popular of all teams are Boca Juniors and River Plate, both with their stadiums in Buenos Aires. The weekend just past was the clash of these titans, and it turned out to be quite a spectacular event.

I didn’t get to go to the football match as it was too popular and could not get tickets. It turned out to be one of the most sensational games of the season, or perhaps even more sensational than that. Let us look at the background for these two games first because it is this setting that made it so sensational.

The Competition
The current competition had the two teams, Boca and River running neck and neck, with Boca in the lead by two points. All River needed to do was win this game to get three points, putting them in the lead. The chances of this was very slim, even though River was playing really well, because Boca had won 30 games straight in their home stadium and did not look like letting this record slip. It was these things that totally packed out the stadium.

Watching the Game
At 3pm on Sunday afternoon, when the game started, I walked the streets with a friend of mine to find a place that we could watch it on television. Unfortunately, only certain places who were willing to pay the extra fee for the encrypted channel could show the game, and there was not a single place that was not full. In fact, every single place had people filling the inside so full that they were overflowing onto the footpaths and even the road at times. It was a very popular game.

We finally found ourselves inside a very expensive restaurant after a twenty minute wait. It was from here, craning my neck to see the distant television screen over the top of a high wall that we were able to see the rest of the game transpire. So when River won, it was a huge sensation over here. Not only was River now ahead in the competition, but they won in Boca’s stadium and also broke Boca’s 30 straight wins in their home stadium too.

Protecting Supporters
Soccer games can be really dangerous here and often people die or are killed after the game. To get the River supporters out safely, the River team hired over 1000 police to form a line between the River and the Boca supporters. It was incredible to see riot police, mounted police, and powerful weapons on display everywhere, and as the supporters flowed out of the stadium, the streets were filled to capacity with people.

To reduce the chances of incidents, the Boca supporters were kept inside the stadium for a further 40 minutes after the game. Even with this delay the two opposing supporters can still end up mixing as it takes so long to disperse from the area. This was one of the reasons why the the police are normally called to help keep the two sides separated, at the cost of the teams. It was all pretty amazing stuff.

Loving to the Limits
The passion for each team runs high and affects people of every age. After the game while I was walking home with two friends we experienced the fury of a Boca Juniors supporter when they saw the River Plate hat that one of us was wearing. An old lady in her 70’s or 80’s suddenly burst out in a brief statement of abuse over our support of the “opposing” team.

The ironic thing about this “attack” was that only one of us was a River Plate supporter. My other friend was a Boca Juniors supporter and I am still undecided at this point as to whether I will take sides. This event took place in a very respectable suburb too. In poorer suburbs such as La Boca where the Boca Juniors stadium resides, true fights and often deaths result between opposing supporters for soccer teams.

Football has reached a form of worship over here, and seems to affect the young and the old alike. How scary that people would take sport to such a level.

Night Markets

It was quite late in the night anyway when the three of us left. We were in a very low-class area of the city and were heading to the night markets in another similar area. I was with two girls, Vicky and Clara from LIFE Argentina, and we had just finished one of the birthday parties that we routinely hold for the kids in these areas.

Getting There
It was not safe enough to walk from the party to the bus stop, so we took a taxi. Taxis in this place are normal cars. Well, not exactly normal, since it was falling apart. Rust and dents enveloped the whole thing and it sounded like it would stop at the next corner. Our conversations were only in Spanish from this point on, because there was a danger of being robbed should we be heard to speak English.

We paid a very cheap fare to the driver as we piled out near the bus stop. From here we crossed over a railway line, only metres from the train waiting at the station, and after asking directions, found our way to the bus stop.

The bus was extremely old and rattled and shook as we journeyed over poorly maintained roads toward our destination. There was no choice but to stand in this vehicle that was heavily packed with passengers. As we near our destination, the huge iron roofed buildings housing the markets came into view, and then we stopped. In the middle of nowhere.

Outside the bus, in the darkness of night, we found ourselves in line and moving at the directions of a forceful man. Before us were dozens of old and beaten up cars, some already pulling out of their parking spots, filled with people. It was a scene like the start of a great race where the drivers first run to their cars.

There was an urgency to all we did in this place, and the three of us quickly filled the back seat of one of the mobile wrecks. If I had thought the first car we rode in was old and rough, then it had been a luxury model compared to this one. Rust was so prolific in this car that certain areas were totally missing. The boot did not close and neither did my door, so I ended up holding it in place.

Our journey, with two people sharing the one front seat, was only a short distance compared to how far we had come. We passed through some tough looking neighbourhoods and over some very rough roads before we reached our destination. Throughout the journey my entertainment was the poor people stuffed tightly into the van before us. I could see their faces pushed against the back windows as they bounced and rattled over the roads.

River Crossing
The car park we stopped at was just across a river from the markets. The lights of a police car nearby were like a beacon in the darkness surrounding us. We passed them as we joined the growing line of people waiting to cross the river over a narrow footbridge, long since past its use-by-date. The steel structures of the bridge showed advanced signs of fatigue and heavy rusting, and the flooring rose up to meet our feet in places. With no space between us all, it seemed there were too many people for it to support.

In the darkness, illuminated only by the lights of the markets, we often held each other, struggling to remain together. I was thankful for the few breaks and openings in the wire mesh surrounding our caged walkway, and noted the nearest points for escape should the bridge collapse into the water below.

Beside us was a train track, which people were also walking across since the line for our walkway was so long and slow. This would have been fine if a train was not approaching. A loud horn like that of a ship sounded long blasts, indicating the impending doom of those who remained on the tracks.

Those on the tracks started scattering, some running back the way they had come. Others tried to forge ahead to the other side, but their time was too short. A large opening in our caged walkway allowed those remaining to jump through in front of us. Each one showing obvious signs of relief on their face as they escaped the imminent danger.

The Markets
The moment we got off the footbridge, we entered the markets. Stalls everywhere, packed so tight that only narrow corridors of dust remained for hundreds of people to squeeze through. This was not the main markets however, and after passing through the bus area, also littered with stalls, we finally reached the main markets.

It was hard to move through all of the people in this place, and pushing and shoving was the norm. I thought it was filled to capacity, but after shopping for several hours I realised how wrong I was. People pushed with no concern for consequences, and at times we would be pushed off balance by someone trying to barge through the crowds.

Each stall in the main markets were formed from little square booths of iron and wire, and sold every type of clothing imaginable. Shoes, shirts, pants, jackets, sweaters, and underwear. Toys, baby clothes and even food was for sale here. I even saw parrots, snakes and other animals on offer. And everything was cheap.

Shopping
People had come from all over the country to buy from these markets. Many people however, had come here to buy for their shop. They would pull or push huge trolleys filled with bags of clothing. It was almost miraculous that they could move through such an inundation of people. These purchased goods were to be resold for much higher prices back at their shops.

Each of us had our own agenda for what we wanted to purchase. Vicky, who had been here before, was our guide through the chaos. She returned a few items she had bought last time and bought some clothes for herself and others as gifts.

Both girls were looking for some new jeans, wanting to try them on before buying them. There were no dressing rooms here, so in preparation they had worn running pants underneath their clothes. I liked their idea, so I too tried on my pants before buying them, arguing that my long underwear was somewhat similar to the girls’ running pants. The embarrassment of the girl in the stall and the number of looks I received during this process told me that apparently this was not a very common process. The pants fit however, so I bought them.

Shopping with girls is always a slower process than with guys. If I like something I buy it. Simple and quick. The girls, and more power to them, have to decide not only if they like it, but whether they have too many of that particular colour, if it is too similar to their friends’ clothes, what other clothes will go with this new potential item, and many other decisions that all slow the process down to a snails pace.

This time I did not mind that it was so slow, because it was a great opportunity to listen to the Spanish as they spoke. During this time I learned many new words relating specifically to shopping, clothes, and colours. It was quite enlightening, and in the end I walked out with a pair of pants, two shirts and a sweater, all of which I had tried on to be sure they fit me.

Return Home
Shopping completed, Vicky calls her mum to reaffirm that we have not been mugged and we head off toward the bus stop to go home. It is freezing cold outside as we make our way along the narrow edge of the road. There is no sidewalk for us, and the cars moving past only add to our dangers. Although the carparks are safe from cars, muggers from the surrounding slums often lie in wait for the unwary. So we persist along the road.

After a number of conversations we discover the location of our bus stop. It is an un-posted corner. Here we wait, staring at a darkened car park in one direction and a slum only metres away in the other. Between them both sits the road we had walked, choked with cars, buses and trucks as people head home from the markets.

Our journey home takes us through many poorly lit and very tough looking neighbourhoods and over some very rough roads. We are all tired now and after a change of buses we are glad to make it back home. I leave the girls at their place and walk the forty minutes it takes to get back to my hostel.

It was a shopping trip to remember. The night markets.

NOTE: This took place near the beginning of May, 2004, and was a lot of fun as well as being quite dangerous. I did not get to take any photos at all during the time because of the danger it posed both to me and to the girls I was with. There were many amazing sights however, not the least of them being seeing people hanging off the side and out of the doors of a dilapidated old bus as it drove past us. Perhaps there will be an opportunity to return and take photos, but even if not, the memories will remain with me for a long time.

Language of Flowers

The origin of this information
Many years ago I inherited an old old dictionary from my grandmother. It is very old and contains many interesting facts relevant to the years it was published. As we know only too well, time moves on and things change.

Going back to something like this dictionary makes for interesting reading. Many words found in it are no longer in active use in our language today. Some words are still used but their meaning has changed quite dramatically.

On this page is part of the information found in this interesting book pertaining to the Language of the Flowers. Remember as you read this that the era was circa 1930’s and many things have changed since then. It is unlikely that a person given flowers with a specific meaning would actually recognise that meaning any more unless it was made obvious via a note or some other clear hint.

Who knows the meanings now?
I was told by my mother that few people fully understood the meaning that flowers conveyed even during her days. Although at the time they still knew the meaning of certain flowers, many of the more unusual meanings were not recognised.

So if you would like to let your flowers do the talking for you in a message then be sure that your intended party is educated in the language of flowers so they can then decipher the meaning you intended.

Using the Language of Flowers is almost a forgotten art, except for our oldest generations. I am sure if you gave a meaningful flower or set of flowers to your grandmother or grandfather then the meaning would not be lost on them. This would be your best chance. So why not give it a go. I am certain they would be most grateful for your most thoughtful gesture.

The rules for creating messages
A cluster of flowers can be made to express and sentiment if care is taken in the selection.

If a flower is offered reversed, its original signification is contradicted, and the oppostie implied.

A rosebud without thorns, but keeping leaves, conveys the sentiment, “I fear no longer; I hope.” Stripped of leaves and thorns, it signifies, “There is nothing to hope or fear.”

A full-blown rose, placed over two buds, signifies “Secrecy.”

“Yes” is implied by touching the flower to the lips; “No,” by pinching off a petal and casting it away.

“I am” is expressed by a laurel leaf twined around the bouquet; “I have,” by an ivy leaf folded together; “I offer you,” by a leaf of Virginia creeper.

Meanings of single flowers

Flower Colour Meaning
Arbor Vitae Unchanging friendship
Camelia White Loveliness
Candy-tuft Indifference
Carnation White Disdain
China Aster Variety
Clover Four-Leaf Be mine
Clover White Think of me
Clover Red Industry
Columbine Folly
Daisy Innocence
Daisy Coloured Beauty
Dead Leaves Sadness
Deadly Nightshade Falsehood
Fern Fascination
Forget-me-not Do not forget me
Fuchsia Scarlet Taste
Geranium Horseshoe Stupidity
Geranium Rose Preference
Geranium Scarlet Consolation
Golden Rod Be cautious
Heliotrope Devotion
Hyacinth White Loveliness
Hyacinth Purple Sorrow
Ivy Friendship
Lily Day Coquetry (seek to attract attention/admiration; flirt)
Lily Water Purity of heart
Lily White Sweetness
Lily Yellow Gayety (lively; merry; full of spirits; cheerful)
Lily of the Valley Unconscious sweetness
Mignonette Your qualities surpass your charms
Monkshead Danger is near
Myrtle Love
Oak Hospitality
Any Blossom Orange Chastity
Pansy Thoughts
Passion Flower Faith
Primrose Inconsistency
Rose Love
Rose Damask Beauty ever new
Rose White I am worthy of you
Rose Yellow Jealousy
Rosebud Moss Confession of Love
Smilax Constancy
Straw Agreement
Straw Broken Broken agreement
Sweet Pea Depart
Thistle Sternness
Tuberose Dangerous pleasures
Verbena Pray for me
White Jasmine Amiability
Witch Hazel A spell

 

Meaning of flowers in combinations

Moss Rosebud, Myrtle A confession of love
Mignonette, Coloured Daisy Your qualities surpass your charms of beauty
Lily of the Vally, Ferns Your unconscious sweetness
Yellow Rose, Broken Straw, Ivy Your jealousy has broken our friendship
Scarlet Geranium, Passion Flower, Purple Hyacinth, Arbor Vitae I trust you will find consolation, through faith, in your sorrow; be assured of my unchanging friendship
Columbine, Day Lily, Broken Straw, Witch Hazel, Coloured Daisy Your folly and coquetry have broken the spell of your beauty
White Pink, Canary Grass, Laurel Your talent and perseverance will win you glory
Golden-rod, Monkshead, Sweet Pea, Forget-me-not Be cautious; danger is near; I depart soon; forget-me-not

 

Self-saucing chocolate pudding

Serves 6
INGREDIENTS

Pudding
1 cup plain flour
1 teaspoon baking powder
3/4 cup castor sugar
1/4 cup cocoa
1/2 cup milk
30g butter
Some drops of vanilla escence

Chocolate Sauce
3/4 cup brown sugar
firmly packed 1/4 cup cocoa
extra 1-1/4 cups hot water

METHOD

Preparations
Preheat oven to a high moderate heat. Boil water. Melt butter.

Pudding
Sift flour, sugar and cocoa into a large oven proof bowl. Make a well in the centre of ingredients. Melt the butter and combine with milk then gradually stir it in. Mix until smooth.

Chocolate Sauce
Add the dry sauce ingredients over the top of the pudding mix (brown sugar and sifted extra cocoa). Pour the hot water gently over the top of these ingredients and place the dish into a preheated oven.

Baking & Serving
Bake in a moderate oven for about an hour or until the pudding is well risen and firm to the touch. Serve hot with icecream and cream as desired.

The Learning Curve

Speed of Learning
You have heard it said that there is a learning curve, that some things have a steep learning curve and others have a shallow or easy learning curve. But what exactly is this learning curve?

What is a learning curve?
A learning curve demonstrates the process of learning something. When you first start to learn something it takes a while to understand and then build on your inital knowledge. After a while there is a sound foundation of knowlege that can be build upon. This continues until past the intermediate stage, after which it takes longer to learn new things again. Think of it as a flattened out S (see diagram to right).

We are all learning
Learning is something we all have to deal with for the rest of our lives. My grandmother used to say, “you learn something new every day!” Most of us do.

When we are in school our learning is obvious. When we start work we are still learning. Changing jobs or positions requires even more learning. Moving house requires learning new addresses and telephone numbers, a new car requires new techniques, even picking up a magazine introduces you to new information. All of this is learning, although not all of it is new learning.

Familiar learning
Once we have been doing the same thing for a long time then sometimes we may think we are not learning. We are, but probably just not in new areas. Every program we see on television teaches us something new, as does every advertisement too. When we browse the Internet or read magazines we are learning something new again. Because we are used to learning in these ways our learning is non-obtrusive and seems easy.

You see, our knowledge of most of these areas is sufficiently complete. When learning new information such as stated above, all that is needed is a quick memorisation of the bits you need to know. Learning someone’s phone number for example does not take too long. All that is needed is remembering eight (or more) digits that comprise the number in the order they are presented.

Learning in new areas
But what if we didn’t know what a phone number was, how to use it, when to use it, or what even a telephone was? What if we had not seen numbers before and had to also learn that the digit “8” is spoken as “eight”? In this case, learning the new phone number would take considerably longer. There is a lot of extra information that is needed before a simple memorisation of the numbers can occur. This is what it is like to learn in a new area.

When we learn in new areas it can be very hard. Everything is unfamiliar and there seems to be nothing that we can use to make sense of all of the new knowledge we are gaining. This is when learning is often slow going and is the type of learning that the learning curve relates to. Let us look deeper into this type of learning and find out how the learning curve gets its shape.

The slow curve… Building foundations
Learning CurveUsing the previous example of learning something as simple as a phone number, there is a lot of prior knowledge required before we can learn only the numbers. This prior knowledge is sometimes known as hooks. Something that we need to learn first, on which we can then hang other knowledge. These hooks are all the basics, the foundational pieces of information and understanding that allows us to then interpret correctly all of the rest of the information we learn.

Consider the foundations of a highrise building. When the building begins, they do not build up, but rather start digging down. This is needed to ensure the foundations are right. As they keep building, many weeks can go past as the foundations are put in place and finalised. All of this happens before we see a single level added to the building.

When first venturing into a new subject there is a lot of foundational work to be done first. During this stage it can seem like our head is swimming with information and there is nowhere to put it. But over time each bit of information starts to find a place. At this point hooks have started to develop. The information swimming around our head can be hung onto them and everything is starting to make sense.

This foundation period is represented by the initial flat part of the graph. During this phase learning takes a long time. The flatter the graph the longer it takes to learn a given amount of information.

The fast curve… Building the structure
Returning to our building analogy, once the foundations are in place the progress seems to surge ahead. The building structure is erected in a very short time. However the building itself would not last without solid foundations. This is the same with our learning.

Once we have a solid foundation of knowledge, adding to it becomes quite a straight forward process. All we need to learn is the information that is new. Anything that we already know does not need to be learnt again. We select only the new information from what is before us. This makes our learning process easier because there is now less information to learn.

On our learning curve, this period of learning is represented by the steep curve. The steep curve indicates that a lot of learning takes place within a short amount of time. It is during this stage that most people find learning fun.

The second slow curve… Fitting out the structure
Now that we have our foundations in place and the building structure is also built, the apparent speed of building once again slows down. This is because the finer details are being put into the building. Painting and tiling and decorating all has to happen before the building is finished. Some of this work is slow and tedious.

With our learning, we have our foundational knowledge and skills and the basics. After this the learning process slows down once again. That is because the finer points of knowledge take longer to learn. This is represented by the second flat curve at the top right of our graph.

Whatever the area there is more to learn. Playing guitar involves the foundations of music theory, strumming, and finger placement for chords. The structure involves learning songs and different strumming styles. The details of learning may include playing with harmonics, increasing the speed of chord changes, or improving your fingerpicking styles.

Learning in any area does not stop. It only stops when we decide we have learnt sufficient. Some of the best in their field acknowlege that there is always more that they need to learn. One of the best concert musicians of his time was still practicing five hours a day well into his later years. When asked why he spent so much time practicing still, he replied, “because I think I am still improving”.

Not all of us need to learn everything about a particular area, but all of us need to learn. The most important thing to remember about learning and the learning curve is that the first part is the hardest. Get past this and you will find learning a joy.

And remember… we never ever stop learning. It is a lifetime thing!

Some Biblical Wisdom

A brief look at some wisdom from the Bible…

He who loves silver will not be satisfied with silver; nor he who loves abundance, with increase.

When goods increase, they who eat them also increase. So what profit do the owners have except to see it with their eyes?

The sleep of a labouring man is sweet, whether he eats little or much; but the abundance of the rich will not permit him to sleep.

As he came from his mother’s womb, naked shall he return, to go as he came; and he shall take nothing from his labor which he may carry away in his hand. Just exactly as he came, so shall he go.

Ecclesiastes 5:10-16 (excerpts)